Monday, November 17, 2014

Is It Time to Move On? [11-17-14]

I have heard this quote many times whenever I was feeling down. I've been feeling down especially recently so the quote came back into mind. But what do you do when what you're trying to accomplish is bringing you down even more? What if it costs you more than what you make back?

For those of you that follow and read my blog, you know I've been trying to start my own little business that started off just as selling jewelry. But recently I've gotten more into all types of accessories. I've been working on things with fabric but without a proper machine, it's annoyingly difficult.

With little issues like those on top of not having enough income to pay for bills and to take care of my rabbits, much less myself, I will admit that it's all been getting me down. (There are other more personal issues as well but I will not get into those here...) Not to mention that winter is practically here and it's been very gloomy and cloudy.

I save my money and haven't even bought any Lolita or Gyaru stuff in months. Save for one dress that I have allowed myself to be my one treat.

I've even resorted to selling off a lot of my Lolita as seen on my shop Kieli's Stuff 4 Sale...

Having talked with friends, reading inspiring blogs and such used to renew my strength but this time I'm seriously considering...

Should I just quit? Should I just give up on my dream of being some kind of artist? 

It wouldn't be so bad if I had a few sales in my shop in a month versus one every two-three months. Or if it felt like someone was actually reading this blog. Or maybe a Graphic Design job place would give me a chance. Being someone who has never really had a special talent and had to really dig to find what I can do, it really is frustrating that I can't find my talent if I have one.

To list on Etsy, it costs 20¢ per listing. And to re-list over 100 items after they expire in four months just doesn't add up as possible for my wallet. I've done all I can with social media and this blog. But now I really feel....

I'm at a crossroads.

Part of me is really fighting to keep this going. But the other part doesn't understand why I would do that. Is the miracle really going to happen when I do officially give up? Or is this just the dreamer in me talking and I should just sell my supplies and move on?

This was my original thinking up until now.

I almost made the mistake of allowing this feeling sorry for myself take over my judgment and give up. But I have been on this for far too long, worked too hard on it and I'm just too darn stubborn. I've heard that it takes at least three years for lil shops to take off. So I'm going to try to hang in there. I don't want to give up. I just can't. 

I'm going to keep digging for my real talent until I find it. I'm determined. 
So don't give up, okay?


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